Do you really have a chance?

I'm redecorating!

You can’t make people give you what you and treat you how you want to be treated. You can only decide what you will and won’t tolerate… and either hope for the best or make a decision. Today I made a decision!

God wants you to know that every day you can choose to either be GRATEFUL or DISAPPOINTED - it’s all in your hands! You can worry to no end about what you don't have or you can marvel at God's breathtaking gifts: the morning dew, the sun, the clouds, the trees, the flowers, the birds. Could you create any of these? These miracles of life are always around you, ready to be celebrated, ready to be welcomed into your life.

 I’m redecorating!  My house?  No!  My life!  I’m changing the furniture.  I’m throwing out the broken pieces and the eyesores. I’m painting the walls in bright vibrant colors.  I’m upgrading old appliances. I’m creating a new landscape - free of weeds, thorns and dead grass.  I am loving my new place!

Slowly falling out of love...

To My Lil’ Sis…

You’re going through some pain now and I hope you can write your way through it.  Writing is my therapy.  I’m sharing this poem with you.  I know all too well the joy and pain of love.  I am also all too familiar with the process of falling out of love.  The good news is, the heart is the most resilient muscle in your body and it will bounce back …and when it heals it’s even stronger than before.  We will find love again and I’m looking forward to the two of us sharing our happy stories …soon!

LET IT GO!

When people can walk away from you - let them walk. Don't try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. Hang up the phone. When people can walk away from you, let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The Bible says, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. Can I get an Amen!!

“They went out from us, but they did not really belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us.” [1 John 2:19] Let them go! And it doesn't mean they’re a bad person, it simply means their part in the story is over.   And you've got to know when a person’s part in your story is over so you don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when it's dead. You've got to know when it's over.

Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have, He will give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat, I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!! If you’re holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to...LET GO!!!!!!!

PS - EVERYONE YOU MEET WILL NOT NECESSARILY BE THE ONE!! ENJOY EACH SEASON! SAVOR LIFE AND ITS WONDERS.

So much to be THANKFUL for...

"Spiritual but not religious" ...what does than mean?

"Spiritual but not religious" ...what does than mean? And if you don't know what it means STOP claiming it!  I am getting increasingly bothered by people who say they are "spiritual but not religious".  If I hear it one more time I will SCREAM!! (I think I just did!)

People need look up the definition of the word religious before they choose to deny it or claim it.  According to Webster’s: Definition of RELIGIOUS:  1: relating to or manifesting faithful devotion to an acknowledged ultimate reality or deity <a religious person> <religious attitudes> 2: of, relating to, or devoted to religious beliefs or observances <joined a religious order> 3 : scrupulously and conscientiously faithful.

I am concerned when people tout that they are "spiritual but not religious” as if it's a great badge to display.  Religious to me means…I believe in God, I know that I am saved by the blood of Jesus Christ and know He died for my sins.  It means I have a church affiliation, even if I don't go every Sunday. It means I own a Bible and I open it from time to time.  It means I pray constantly, not only for things I desire, but for the needs of others, and I say prayers of thanks for the blessings God has already provided. And most important, it means I acknowledge that there is power much greater than me and its The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit! 

Okay, I feel better now...

What is one thing you are thankful for?

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, what is one thing you are thankful for?

Do you know what is sexy? A man who exposes his vulnerability. What scares you about love and relationships?

Do you know what is sexy?  A man who exposes his vulnerability. I asked the question, "What are men afraid of in relationships?" I received this message in my inbox today.  It is too powerful not to share!

 “I am so ready to meet the woman who is capable of being my partner for life. I have shut down and refused to fully receive or return the love that's been given to me simply because I was afraid. I've held back when I should have given more. I know this, and I've come to terms with my fear as much as I am able. I realize now that part of what I need to do is man up and have the courage to admit that I am scared and that I am willing to make a change. I know that I can't continue to allow my self imposed fears to keep me single. “  Now is a brother who is on a journey to greatest!

Are women more unfaithful than men?

In the past six months three male friends have told me their wives have cheated or have been suspected of cheating.  One friend is trying to work it out with his wife and they are going to counseling, the second friend is contemplating divorce, and the third friend has filed for divorce.  The man who filed for divorce has lost half of his assets to a woman he only married three years ago.

I was so shocked to hear these stories.  I always thought it was men who cheated, but it seems like the tide is turning and cheating is just as (maybe more) pervasive among women.

Questions:

(1) Women often stand by their man. Is it harder for a man to stay with a cheating spouse?
(2) Do women cheat just as much as men?

Some call me high maintenance, but I prefer to be called a "kept" woman!

It’s hard to find a man/woman who… Finish this sentence!

You find yourself going on lots of first dates that leave you with no desire for a second one.  What‘s missing?  What's the one quality you're looking for in a partner that's the hardest to find?

My answer:  It’s hard to find a man who can make ordinary things seem extraordinary. It’s easy to have a good time at a good movie, or a good restaurant.  I want a man I can have a great time with even when the movie is boring and the restaurant serves horrible food.  A man I can sit and talk with for hours and never get bored, simply being with him is enough!

Your ideal mate?

What past or current television character most resembles your ideal mate?

My choice would be Andy Griffith, Sheriff of Mayberry.  He was smart, analytical, strong, deliberate, no nonsense, practical, honest. He was a protector, a single dad, a role model, a problem solver. 

Are we on the same page?

 If we’re going to work together, play together and build together I need to know we’re on the same page.  I’m on the cover… where are you?

What are your five non-negotiables in a relationship?

My five non-negotiables in any relationship...

(1) Must love God

(2) Must love to talk …and listen

(3) Must highly intelligent

(4) Must make me laugh …and smile often

(5) Must treat me like a queen!

Wondering...

Wonder if he misses me

If he thinks about me when he’s by himself

Or am I just a faded memory

He’s placed on a random shelf

Wonder if he thinks about me

And the things we used to do

Or has he forgotten the many secret moments

Shared between us two

Wonder if he ever feels lonely

And he reaches for the phone

Or maybe he’s already replaced me

And he’s not spending his nights alone

Wonder if he ever thinks about us

And how good it could have been

Or has he settled with the thought

Of being just a good friend

Wonder if I’m in his thoughts

Am I still on his mind

Or has he’s truly moved on

And left me far behind

Wonder if still thinks about me

And if our future he’s pondering

Or am I the only one of us

Who is still left wondering

About me...

Life isn’t worth living unless you’re willing to take some big chances. Looking for a man who is willing to trust his heart enough to take a chance on love!  I want a man who is willing to risk it all for love … for my love!  I’m worth the effort and the risk!

I look at life as one wonderful adventure and I can’t wait to see what happens next.  I have spent lots of time building my career, traveling, and dating ...and I’ve enjoyed every moment of that phase of my life.  However, I am now ready to enter into the next phase of my life.  I want to be married.  Why are people (women especially) so afraid to say they want to be married?  I make no apologies for saying it, for feeling it, and for wanting it!

I'm not saying I need a man who is perfect  ... I just need a man who will make it all worth it!

I’m a successful, attractive, intelligent, single black woman – who is mature enough and to accept, respect and recognize a good man. I don’t strive to be a “strong black woman” - instead my aim is to be a “Proverbs 31 Woman” – a woman who is worthy of the blessing of a strong black man! When God blesses me with a good man, I will be wise enough to hold onto him with both hands and my full heart.

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. Ride or die! I give all of me, 100% unconditionally!

He had me at hello...

Welcome to my life...

I'm a 44 year old, lover of Jesus, daughter, sister, neighbor, friend and a woman in pursuit of her God given destiny. I'm a woman who knows the best is yet to come! God says it and I truly believe it!